Raising a child is tough. No one really talks about the fact that when kids come into this world, between the ages of 1-7, they push a lot of buttons. Specifically- they will trigger within the adult caring for them all the adult’s childhood wounds and test the adult’s patience big time. Each child will do this in their own unique way and no two children are alike. Even siblings, will perhaps be similar, but also very different. Many children come into the world and are not like “typical” children. They are strong willed, have big feelings, have unique sensory needs, will not be placed into any boxes and behave in large ways without regard for anyone else’s feelings. This is because developmentally they cannot really put themselves in another’s shoe. It isn’t until the age of 7-ish that a child can actually begin to understand taking into consideration someone else’s perspective. It is up to the adult caring for the child to allow the child to feel all their feelings in a safe way without attempting to “change” the child. This requires a concept of teaching the child through understanding where they are at developmentally and supporting them compassionately. As a caregiver, there will always be moments when you find yourself overwhelmed by a small child- this is when it is your job to step back and check yourself. You need to get yourself in order so that you teach the child how to regulate emotions by not loosing your shit. And if you happen to loose your shit, then just attempt to do better next time. Kids are indeed resilient little creatures, they were built that way, look how resilient you are! The old way of disciplining in America was authoritative and controlling. There is, however, a differet way to do it- and it is conscious, mindful and loving. The way I’m speaking about is rooted in meeting a child where they are at and assisting in laying a foundation of making them feel supported, teaching them about healthy emotional processing, letting them be their unique little selves and always treating them with loving kindness and compassion no matter what. For example- instead of coming at a small child telling them “no” for everything that they do that you don’t like or isn't safe- you get to the root of why they are doing that thing and teach them a better way to communicate what it is that they need. For instance, if a child is hitting- look at the circumstances around why and give the child tools to deal with the feelings that are leading to the behavior and assist them in regulating their unique sensory system. If this sounds interesting know that I have worked with small children for almost 20 years in a professional manner and am opening up myself as a resource for parents struggling with how to respond to children in moments that are overwhelming such as during tantrums or displays of aggressive behaviors. I am actively working on putting together services such as “coffee chats” with parents or caregivers where we just talk a little about what is going on with their little one and see if I have any insights , ideas, suggestions, or points in the right direction for possible added supports for the family. I will also offer things like personalized social stories for little ones about starting preschool, going potty, what to do when I feel upset, and any other topics caregivers are looking for. Additionally I will offer myself to put together personalized kits for children such as sensory bins. To learn more about me visit and peruse www.blissfulbutterflyyoga.com Also be sure to follow my budding Instagram page @blissfulbutterflykids
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